So today I have decided its time to turn over a new leaf...per say. For the last couple months I have really been stressing about my weight, money, the wedding and my family...among other things. But, this morning when I woke up I decided I really need to stop worrying about EVERYTHING! It isn't doing anything for me, it isn't making me any happier and all it does is make me feel like i need to puke. So on my list of things that I can fix now is my weight...
I mean it really has just gotten to the point where I look at myself and try to figure out where I went wrong, was it the chicken nuggets or the cheeseburger? Either way I am tired of it. So as of today I am swearing off fast food, chocolate, deserts and basically all the good stuff. I think it hit me while I was shopping for a new bathing suit for the trip to Missouri that I need to stop. I mean fast food is way convenient often times, but how convenient will it be in the future if I have a heart attack from enjoying that burger?
The last time I was home my brother told me he is worried about me and doesn't want me to die early because of my weight. It's a real eye opener to have your younger brother tell you he's worried you are going to die. So that opened my eyes a bit, then the bathing suit incident...I tried on two different types, which maybe 3 months ago would have looked awesome on me, but now...not so much. I looked in the mirror and for once couldn't pretend that I liked what I saw. I am sure most people know I work in Lane Bryant...a plus size woman's store...so I see a lot of body types and sizes. I shop there myself, if nothing else because the discount is good and clothes are hot. But, slowly I started seeing that the clothes weren't making me feel any better about myself. Clothes have always made me feel good, made me happy and made me feel like "damn i am one finnnneeeee bitch". After this last shopping trip(getting stuff for our trip to Missouri) I realized, clothes aren't making me feel good anymore. And that, is not me.
So today is Day 1 of a newer, healthier Sam. So I guess I am saying a fond farewell to pizza, burgers, fries, cake, cookies, brownies...you know all the comfort foods that everyone claims makes you feel better...No, all it does is make you feel fuller, fatter and bigger. Comfort food has made me feel uncomfortable in my own skin and its not okay with me.
I guess the fact that in 5 months I am going to be putting on a white gown might also be a motivator huh?
Now onto other stressers...money really just needs to be abolished. It just totally sucks. I mean you get your bills paid off, think you have a little breathing room and whamo...no you don't. And, with the economy in the shitter forget trying to find a legit job to supplement your funds. As a side note, anyone who is considering going to a private college...DON'T! School loans will kill you at the most inopportune times (like while your unemployed and only working part time to make ends meet). Ps- I have to thank Andrew for being so wonderfully supportive and stable...without you I don't know what I would do.
The wedding is coming...seemingly slowly and quickly all at once! I think about it and by the time Andrew and I get married we will have been engaged for 22 months...but then I think about it and I'm like "omigod the wedding is in 5 months". The planning for the most part is all settled in, the big stuff is taken care of, now its just the details, like dress fittings, flower selections and seating arrangements. Just so you all know, if you end up sitting with someone you don't know please don't be yourself or tell stories about Andrew or I...most people will laugh out of courtesy so you think your charming...but really...they are thinking what the hell?
Family stuff...well is family stuff, as per the usual. I miss my insane, crazy, dysfunctional family really bad some days(read- most days), but here is where I have to be, for the time being. Probably the hardest part is that when I go down to visit, I just feel so comfortable, like I am a kid again...then I come home there's bills to worry about, the dog to be walked, work to go to, cleaning to be done...you get the drift. The homeland is like sanctuary, but it makes it even harder to be in the place you are trying to make home. I mean, who doesn't want to go back and live where the bill collectors can't find you, where mom makes dinner and you only have to clean up and where the house magically cleans itself every day?
I guess what it comes down to is that I am so grateful to Andrew and my family, sometimes I want both at the same time...I want to be a mature, responsible adult, getting married soon...at the same time I want to be a 11 year old kid whose mom makes dinner and whose family can take care of and fix everything and anything...how does one reconcile the differences and make it work? I guess you'll just have to stay tuned to find out!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
The Balancing Act
So in the past month since moving, my life has become somewhat of a balancing act. A walk across a tight rope, if you will.
Living 4 hours away from my family has become quite the challenge, one I never thought I'd have to deal with. Living in Albany, and then even Clifton Park was only 2 hours, not a big deal and I got to see my family often, either by me going down to my parents or by my mom coming to visit me at the apartment. Now, its 4 hours to get to my family...and for some reason it's really bothering me. It could be that it's getting closer to the wedding so I want to be able to be there as much as possibly helping plan and being involved and stuff. Or, maybe it's because I actually miss my brother(gasp- something I never, ever would have seen happening) because as he's getting older, I am starting to realize that he really is a pretty ok person(read tolerable co-habitant who can sometimes be cool). It's almost like when I am at my parents I can actually relax now, something that when I was a kid, didn't seem like it was possible. Keeping in touch with my family isn't any kind of problem, I mean I talk to my mom like 8 times a day(read on some days its damn excessive and others not nearly enough), but it's just not the same as being there, sitting down to dinner or watching a movie together.
Or maybe it's that I miss my best friend. I mean what is life without that special person who you can always lean on without feeling the least bit guilty? Mand and I might talk every day and text til our thumbs fall off, but there is just something about being able to drop everything, jump in the car and go get ice cream or a chicken parm wrap(yes, I know these references may not mean anything to some people, but to us...it's in our hearts). I miss her something awful. I really do. And nothing rips at my heart like knowing how sad she is sometimes and when she tells me she misses me, all I want to do is jump in my car and go...and if it were possible, I'd do it.
And of course, it goes without saying(read- I'm going to say it anyway) wedding planning is such a friggin balancing act, I really need a scale in order to get half of this crud done. Making everyone, parents, family, friends and then ourselves happy...is pretty dang taxing on my psyche. Mix that with doing the whole shebang on a budget and still trying to have it look fabulous. Add in the fact that I am working in a new store in an area that I am attempting to learn and well...my brain kind of becomes something resembling hot oatmeal and melted ice cream.
Of course, I still am trying to get myself to realize i am going to be getting married in less than 6 months. I've been engaged for over a year now. I can't believe how slowly and yet how fast things are happening. Sometimes I look around and feel like everything has changed but me...like my world has changed and I've been through it, but not a part of it.
I guess I just feel like everything is changing in my roots, my family is growing up, the dynamic is different there...not in a bad way, just different. My best friend has changed(also not in a bad way) and I guess all these changes, kind of make me feel like I am not a part of it anymore? That everything is leaving me behind?
Living 4 hours away from my family has become quite the challenge, one I never thought I'd have to deal with. Living in Albany, and then even Clifton Park was only 2 hours, not a big deal and I got to see my family often, either by me going down to my parents or by my mom coming to visit me at the apartment. Now, its 4 hours to get to my family...and for some reason it's really bothering me. It could be that it's getting closer to the wedding so I want to be able to be there as much as possibly helping plan and being involved and stuff. Or, maybe it's because I actually miss my brother(gasp- something I never, ever would have seen happening) because as he's getting older, I am starting to realize that he really is a pretty ok person(read tolerable co-habitant who can sometimes be cool). It's almost like when I am at my parents I can actually relax now, something that when I was a kid, didn't seem like it was possible. Keeping in touch with my family isn't any kind of problem, I mean I talk to my mom like 8 times a day(read on some days its damn excessive and others not nearly enough), but it's just not the same as being there, sitting down to dinner or watching a movie together.
Or maybe it's that I miss my best friend. I mean what is life without that special person who you can always lean on without feeling the least bit guilty? Mand and I might talk every day and text til our thumbs fall off, but there is just something about being able to drop everything, jump in the car and go get ice cream or a chicken parm wrap(yes, I know these references may not mean anything to some people, but to us...it's in our hearts). I miss her something awful. I really do. And nothing rips at my heart like knowing how sad she is sometimes and when she tells me she misses me, all I want to do is jump in my car and go...and if it were possible, I'd do it.
And of course, it goes without saying(read- I'm going to say it anyway) wedding planning is such a friggin balancing act, I really need a scale in order to get half of this crud done. Making everyone, parents, family, friends and then ourselves happy...is pretty dang taxing on my psyche. Mix that with doing the whole shebang on a budget and still trying to have it look fabulous. Add in the fact that I am working in a new store in an area that I am attempting to learn and well...my brain kind of becomes something resembling hot oatmeal and melted ice cream.
Of course, I still am trying to get myself to realize i am going to be getting married in less than 6 months. I've been engaged for over a year now. I can't believe how slowly and yet how fast things are happening. Sometimes I look around and feel like everything has changed but me...like my world has changed and I've been through it, but not a part of it.
I guess I just feel like everything is changing in my roots, my family is growing up, the dynamic is different there...not in a bad way, just different. My best friend has changed(also not in a bad way) and I guess all these changes, kind of make me feel like I am not a part of it anymore? That everything is leaving me behind?
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Let's get it on...
So the wedding is just over 6 months away and time has flown by. It's really scary thinking about how quickly the biggest day of my life is approaching. Now, don't get that confused with any thought of I'm not ready, I'm not sure or anything else...I am damn sure!
So last night when I got home from work(part time retail slave to fat bitchy women...of which sometimes I am one) and Andrew had my computer torn apart, because it was mooing at me...yea thats right it sounded like a small cow had taken up residence in the computer and was freaking me out...I mean I enjoy a good steak, a burger and sure as hell like cheese(comes from milk people!). So I would try to get on the computer and all of a sudden a low, painful sounding mooo would come on instead of the computer I was certain that whatever cow god I had offended was coming for what little was left of my soul. You know, the part not devoted to trashy reality TV, and planning my wedding. So i texted him and told him it wasn't working, didn't mention the damn thing was mooing at me. No need for him to think im a looney more than he already does, 6 months before the wedding...I need to seal the deal before I let out the true crazy!
Anyway, fast forward through the bitchy fat ladies at work to me getting home...to a no longer mooing computer...because it was slaughtered. And not even by a butcher, but by my sweet computer programming fiance! He hasn't said it mooed at him, but maybe it made some other horrifying noise, like a fart or something. Either way, he didn't say...so currently I am working on his Mac, and this is just one of the ways I know he loves me...he doesn't freak when I kill computers and instead gives me his own...thats true devotion.
Speaking of devotion this is an awesome cartoon(read almost made me piss myself when i saw it) http://www.maineiac.com/marriage/wedding_vows_pic.jpg
Anyway, in the works for the wedding are the invites, soon to be ordered in April. Which, might, hopefully...be the least stressful part of the next few months. With fittings, alterations, getting the guys tuxes, waiting for RSVPs and then putting together the god awful seating chart I might just be wearing a straight jacket over my dress!
But, in reality, my friends and family have, for the most part, been really good about helping with everything so far. As well as trying to keep me level headed and not have a freak out session.
As far as the Lb situation things are going well, I've been working a lot more up here than I was at the other stores...and most of the people seem pretty cool. The customers are the same range of super awesome, ehh and the "I want to stab you in your ugly face with a pair of dull scissors repeatedly". But, in the grande scheme of things I think there are two kinds of fat women- the ones who are happy being fat because they like food and are comfortable with themselves, and the ones who are miserable because they eat their feelings...and boy do they have alot of them!
So in the words of Marvin Gaye...LETS GET IT ON!
So last night when I got home from work(part time retail slave to fat bitchy women...of which sometimes I am one) and Andrew had my computer torn apart, because it was mooing at me...yea thats right it sounded like a small cow had taken up residence in the computer and was freaking me out...I mean I enjoy a good steak, a burger and sure as hell like cheese(comes from milk people!). So I would try to get on the computer and all of a sudden a low, painful sounding mooo would come on instead of the computer I was certain that whatever cow god I had offended was coming for what little was left of my soul. You know, the part not devoted to trashy reality TV, and planning my wedding. So i texted him and told him it wasn't working, didn't mention the damn thing was mooing at me. No need for him to think im a looney more than he already does, 6 months before the wedding...I need to seal the deal before I let out the true crazy!
Anyway, fast forward through the bitchy fat ladies at work to me getting home...to a no longer mooing computer...because it was slaughtered. And not even by a butcher, but by my sweet computer programming fiance! He hasn't said it mooed at him, but maybe it made some other horrifying noise, like a fart or something. Either way, he didn't say...so currently I am working on his Mac, and this is just one of the ways I know he loves me...he doesn't freak when I kill computers and instead gives me his own...thats true devotion.
Speaking of devotion this is an awesome cartoon(read almost made me piss myself when i saw it) http://www.maineiac.com/marriage/wedding_vows_pic.jpg
Anyway, in the works for the wedding are the invites, soon to be ordered in April. Which, might, hopefully...be the least stressful part of the next few months. With fittings, alterations, getting the guys tuxes, waiting for RSVPs and then putting together the god awful seating chart I might just be wearing a straight jacket over my dress!
But, in reality, my friends and family have, for the most part, been really good about helping with everything so far. As well as trying to keep me level headed and not have a freak out session.
As far as the Lb situation things are going well, I've been working a lot more up here than I was at the other stores...and most of the people seem pretty cool. The customers are the same range of super awesome, ehh and the "I want to stab you in your ugly face with a pair of dull scissors repeatedly". But, in the grande scheme of things I think there are two kinds of fat women- the ones who are happy being fat because they like food and are comfortable with themselves, and the ones who are miserable because they eat their feelings...and boy do they have alot of them!
So in the words of Marvin Gaye...LETS GET IT ON!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Getting to know you...
Well it's been a little more than 2 weeks since the move, so I thought I should update on my life right now. Moving day was hellacious, as only moving days can be. However, it went by quickly with all the help we had (a huge thank you to my family, andrews sister Ally and her bf Jon and Seanie Q). The weather in the morning was an issue, the great storm of Feb 2010 was coming to and end, and had already made me have to postpone the move 1 day and the thought of possibly having to postpone again had me sweating more than I ever had in any gym class, before any test or working any day outside in the sun. In short, I was about 2 seconds away from a nuclear meltdown that would have wiped out the Capitol area all together. So Sunday morning came and it was snowing, not a good sign at all...yet my family made the treck up and we got stuff loaded up to head to my new digs.
By the time we got to the new house, the sun had started shinning, which was a good omen. We unloaded, got the furniture organized and then Andrew and I treated everyone to dinner. Following that most people departed, which is understandable given the ride that everyone had ahead of themselves.
So the last two weeks have been spent unpacking, organizing, getting acclimated and finding the important things in life, like food places and nail salons. All in all the area seems fairly nice, lots to do, pretty much in retail central with a food place on every corner.
Getting the house organized was fairly stressful with a side of pain in the ass. Finding the space you want to put your stuff for the next couple years is really something i never had to think about or plan out before. It was always just a matter of getting things put away enough to be able to live with it that way. This time it was making a home.
So after much tension, stress and a bit of arguing the house is set up. Perfectly? no, but in reality what house is ever perfect? None, thats why its a home.
In other news, since the move I have started back up at Lane Bryant again, the store up here is a bit smaller, but the women are hilarious and pretty laid back. I'm getting alot of hours, which is good for an unemployed bride to be. However, one of the things that has definitely not changed is how bitchy some fat women are... I mean really...go have a piece of chocolate and get off your high horse, which by the way, you might be breaking.
Moving along, I am joining a gym today. The move has been very unkind to my waist line and with my wedding coming up I need to look phenomenal and right now...not so much. So its time to get my ass onto an elliptical and get rid of some jelly. Which is no easy feat given the plethora of food places in the proximity of my house. Never the less, being healthy is important and as diabetes, cancer, heart attacks and the like run strong in my family I figure I should make an effort to get healthy...and stay so. And the fact, that I have promised myself rewards along the way might help too.
So this summer is bound to be interesting and busy for this unemployed bride, and hopefully a healthy one too.
By the time we got to the new house, the sun had started shinning, which was a good omen. We unloaded, got the furniture organized and then Andrew and I treated everyone to dinner. Following that most people departed, which is understandable given the ride that everyone had ahead of themselves.
So the last two weeks have been spent unpacking, organizing, getting acclimated and finding the important things in life, like food places and nail salons. All in all the area seems fairly nice, lots to do, pretty much in retail central with a food place on every corner.
Getting the house organized was fairly stressful with a side of pain in the ass. Finding the space you want to put your stuff for the next couple years is really something i never had to think about or plan out before. It was always just a matter of getting things put away enough to be able to live with it that way. This time it was making a home.
So after much tension, stress and a bit of arguing the house is set up. Perfectly? no, but in reality what house is ever perfect? None, thats why its a home.
In other news, since the move I have started back up at Lane Bryant again, the store up here is a bit smaller, but the women are hilarious and pretty laid back. I'm getting alot of hours, which is good for an unemployed bride to be. However, one of the things that has definitely not changed is how bitchy some fat women are... I mean really...go have a piece of chocolate and get off your high horse, which by the way, you might be breaking.
Moving along, I am joining a gym today. The move has been very unkind to my waist line and with my wedding coming up I need to look phenomenal and right now...not so much. So its time to get my ass onto an elliptical and get rid of some jelly. Which is no easy feat given the plethora of food places in the proximity of my house. Never the less, being healthy is important and as diabetes, cancer, heart attacks and the like run strong in my family I figure I should make an effort to get healthy...and stay so. And the fact, that I have promised myself rewards along the way might help too.
So this summer is bound to be interesting and busy for this unemployed bride, and hopefully a healthy one too.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Screw you Mother Nature
So anyone in the continental US knows that this whole week NY, some parts of New Jersey, Mass. and Penn have been getting slammed with snow storms. Typically this would not be a concern to me, other than the fact that I am supposed to move tomorrow. And thanks to these storms, moving day is now all sorts of effed up. Amanda and Chris aren't going to be able to make it up at all most likely, and my parents are stuck in the storm and might not be able to make it up until Sunday. This typically would not be an issue, except for the fact that Sunday is the last day of my lease, meaning I need to have everything out of the apartment and cleaned up and turn in the keys before the end of the day. Perhaps I am to blame for waiting until the last weekend of my lease to move out, but given the current circumstances (busy family, planning a wedding, commuting fiancé) there wasn't much give anywhere else. So you will have to excuse me while I share my current panic attack musings on what may happen if this BS storm continues throughout today and into tomorrow.
This crap started Tuesday and has been going ever since, Andrew had to stay at the new house for 3 days instead of 1, and not like we won't be living there soon...as long as we get moved...but we currently still live in Clifton Park and I missed him like a bitch. Not like I didn't keep busy finishing up packing and doing the last of the laundry and cleaning and stuff, but still, when you lay down in bed at night, it's nice to be able to snuggle up to the one you love... even if he is already snoring. So, when he was finally able to get home it was really nice...and then the snow continued.
Wednesday we had almost 2 feet of snow...and not that fluffy shit, but the heavy, wet, make you hate your life snow. And man, did I ever. Not only did I break my shovel, I broke my snow brush, cut my hand and got stuck trying to get out of my parking spot. So, cursing all the way I spent an hour of my life, sweating and swearing that someday I will leave New York and go somewhere where the snow is minimal and there isn't a whole season out of the year devoted to that nonsense. After finally getting out of my spot and moving my car I returned to the warmth of my pretty much barren apartment to ride out the storm that was supposed to end that night. Instead it poured rain all day yesterday, while most of my family and friends were snowed in, Andrew and I were on the verge of being flooded out. It was...gross. Then today, the day I am supposed to be getting excited about the move tomorrow and finishing getting everything together... it comes to be that Mother Nature screws me again...my parents, Amanda and Chris are all snowed in...what kind of sick joke is this?
So here I sit, hoping that the storm will pass and my parents will make it up tomorrow in order to get us moved and maybe in the back of my mind holding onto just a little bit of hope that Amanda and Chris will be able to make it...and at the same time hoping everyone is safe and all that happy horse sh*t. But, I cannot tell a lie, I am pissed. Incredibly pissed...at everything and no one all at the same time, because of this storm, both my and Andrew's best friends are going to miss seeing the house, as well as spending some time together. My family has no power...meaning limited use of water, limited cooking ability and a whole lot of boring time together. Amanda and her sister don't have power either but I think that they are probably doing a lot better, all things considered. So I am pissed and frustrated and worried...what IF my family can't make it up and we aren't able to move this weekend? Never having been let down my dad in any moving time I doubt that such will be the case, but what if this time it is?
So yea, I am an angry, frustrated, cold, pissed off New Yorker, joining the thousands of other inconvenienced, snow hating residents. And people wonder why I want to move to the south or out west.
And all of this time to think, has brought me to question...why the hell do people want to live here? The state is overtaxed, over regulated, cold, economically down trodden, snowy, hell hole. And here we are, just having signed into another year (read most likely 2 or 3 years minimum...hi honey!!) of living here. But, after those few years are up, you can look for me somewhere, warm, sunny and more lax on the regulation of their residents...now if only to find that place. I think I need my own private island.
This crap started Tuesday and has been going ever since, Andrew had to stay at the new house for 3 days instead of 1, and not like we won't be living there soon...as long as we get moved...but we currently still live in Clifton Park and I missed him like a bitch. Not like I didn't keep busy finishing up packing and doing the last of the laundry and cleaning and stuff, but still, when you lay down in bed at night, it's nice to be able to snuggle up to the one you love... even if he is already snoring. So, when he was finally able to get home it was really nice...and then the snow continued.
Wednesday we had almost 2 feet of snow...and not that fluffy shit, but the heavy, wet, make you hate your life snow. And man, did I ever. Not only did I break my shovel, I broke my snow brush, cut my hand and got stuck trying to get out of my parking spot. So, cursing all the way I spent an hour of my life, sweating and swearing that someday I will leave New York and go somewhere where the snow is minimal and there isn't a whole season out of the year devoted to that nonsense. After finally getting out of my spot and moving my car I returned to the warmth of my pretty much barren apartment to ride out the storm that was supposed to end that night. Instead it poured rain all day yesterday, while most of my family and friends were snowed in, Andrew and I were on the verge of being flooded out. It was...gross. Then today, the day I am supposed to be getting excited about the move tomorrow and finishing getting everything together... it comes to be that Mother Nature screws me again...my parents, Amanda and Chris are all snowed in...what kind of sick joke is this?
So here I sit, hoping that the storm will pass and my parents will make it up tomorrow in order to get us moved and maybe in the back of my mind holding onto just a little bit of hope that Amanda and Chris will be able to make it...and at the same time hoping everyone is safe and all that happy horse sh*t. But, I cannot tell a lie, I am pissed. Incredibly pissed...at everything and no one all at the same time, because of this storm, both my and Andrew's best friends are going to miss seeing the house, as well as spending some time together. My family has no power...meaning limited use of water, limited cooking ability and a whole lot of boring time together. Amanda and her sister don't have power either but I think that they are probably doing a lot better, all things considered. So I am pissed and frustrated and worried...what IF my family can't make it up and we aren't able to move this weekend? Never having been let down my dad in any moving time I doubt that such will be the case, but what if this time it is?
So yea, I am an angry, frustrated, cold, pissed off New Yorker, joining the thousands of other inconvenienced, snow hating residents. And people wonder why I want to move to the south or out west.
And all of this time to think, has brought me to question...why the hell do people want to live here? The state is overtaxed, over regulated, cold, economically down trodden, snowy, hell hole. And here we are, just having signed into another year (read most likely 2 or 3 years minimum...hi honey!!) of living here. But, after those few years are up, you can look for me somewhere, warm, sunny and more lax on the regulation of their residents...now if only to find that place. I think I need my own private island.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Moving time?!
As I had briefly mentioned in my last post at the end of this month Andrew and I are moving from Clifton Park to New Hartford NY. This move comes about as a result of my unemployment (dumb ass employers). For the last several months Andrew has been commuting to Utica (read Siberia) from our apartment in Clifton Park. After going to college there, he got a job, which has been for the most part a blessing...except for the god awful location. Who in their right mind would ever friggin decide they want to live in Utica?
Oh Utica...cold, snowy, boring Utica. Not to mention, that the general population appear to be hicks, townies and freaks. The area typically starts its winter in late October and it could go until May I would venture to guess. Greeeeeaaaat, because Samantha LOVES (read Hates) the winter. Snow is an inconvenience, no it isn't pretty, no I don't want to ski/snowboard/ice skate/make snowmen or snow angels. That fluffy white crap to me means, slick roads, longer driving times to the modern conveniences I adore and noisy plow trucks coming down my road at the ungodly hours of both morning and night. Add in a healthy dose of the bottom of my pants being wet/my nice shoes getting soaked and perhaps even having to clean off my car, and the whole package is UNHAPPY.
Now, I'm not totally a negative person, so I am looking for the good in this move...and it certainly ain't with the locale or weather. Well, instead of being in an apartment complex, we are renting a house (by far the most friggin adorable house known to man...which I found after many days searching and scouring Craigslist...BTW who in their right mind would think that craigslist would be the place to find a legit home?) But we did, and its so cute. Some of the more braggable attributes include- a washer/dryer in the house, a detached two stall garage, large backyard, and fairly prime location. When we pulled up to the house, Andrew says I squealed "ooooohhhh its a cuuuuute house", which is entirely accurate. Now if only we could figure out a way to pick it up and move it someplace tropical.
Perhaps the biggest issue with the move...is the actual moving. First off, lets just say between the two of us, we have a lot of crap. Yes crap...in addition to our necessary stuff...each of us probably have upwards of 15 pairs of shoes and we both are clothes whores...it looks like I have more but that is only because half of his stuff still resides at his parents house. My clothes...all live together with me...because to be honest and perhaps a bit vain/shallow I adore my clothes. So, in addition to our multitude of shoes and having enough clothes to cover several continents for several days, we have an abundance of electronics, bedding and in general crap. So all this equates to a need to pack a lot of stuff, which is in essence a HUGE pain in the butt. So for the last month I have spent my days going through boxes, bags and tubs worth of stuff we have accumulated in this last year from family wanting to clean our their houses to our visits at garage sales and just things that have followed us throughout our years together.
So following the packing, comes...the inevitable moving of said stuff...which will end this Saturday. My wonderful(read sometimes exasperating) family is coming up, along with my best friend and Andrew's best friend to aide us in the endeavor...which will, I'm sure be most interesting. I am very excited to show off my new home and everything, and yet my trepidations about Saturday continue to grow...what if the weather is bad? what if my parents are fighting? what if I become homicidal?(please note there is a 95% chance this may and will happen). I must admit that moving furniture has absolutely no appeal to me, so I will be content to unpack and direct while the man like creatures move said furniture, followed by grunting, sweating and likely lots of cursing.
The only thing worse than packing and moving...unpacking. With packing you have the option to just take stuff and throw it in boxes and deal with it later, or go the more organized route of packing using bubble wrap, and labels. For the first two weeks of this escapade I packed with labels, bubble wrap and color coded tubs. For the last two weeks, I've looked around and said "ehh screw it" and everything has been mixed. So while I may think tub A holds bedding and tub B holds my pyrex casseroles, it will be so very interesting when I open tub A to find my casserole co mingling with my pillowcases and bedroom TV remote. But really, the true task will be getting it all organized and being comfortable with it. For the first month of living in the apartment I am leaving I would go into the kitchen and think ok drawer number 1 has silverware and drawer number two holds my aluminum foil and cling wrap. It took me a whole month to discover that the damn silverware was in my junk drawer and my junk drawer was occupying 3 other drawers...and now a full year later I am not going to tell you if the junk drawer has been reigned in or if it now occupies the entire kitchen. And yes, it has taken me a full year to learn where everything is and be able to tell Andrew where the spatula is when he yells down the hall to me that he needs something while I am in a different room.
Adaptation and perhaps a strong need for alcohol might get me through this move with flying colors. So on Saturday, while everyone is sleeping in I will be listening to my Dad cursing, my mom saying "no that should go here", Andrew asking where I want X and watching my best friend attempt to stifle her laughter...someone please be taking a shot or having a Captain and Coke for me!
Oh Utica...cold, snowy, boring Utica. Not to mention, that the general population appear to be hicks, townies and freaks. The area typically starts its winter in late October and it could go until May I would venture to guess. Greeeeeaaaat, because Samantha LOVES (read Hates) the winter. Snow is an inconvenience, no it isn't pretty, no I don't want to ski/snowboard/ice skate/make snowmen or snow angels. That fluffy white crap to me means, slick roads, longer driving times to the modern conveniences I adore and noisy plow trucks coming down my road at the ungodly hours of both morning and night. Add in a healthy dose of the bottom of my pants being wet/my nice shoes getting soaked and perhaps even having to clean off my car, and the whole package is UNHAPPY.
Now, I'm not totally a negative person, so I am looking for the good in this move...and it certainly ain't with the locale or weather. Well, instead of being in an apartment complex, we are renting a house (by far the most friggin adorable house known to man...which I found after many days searching and scouring Craigslist...BTW who in their right mind would think that craigslist would be the place to find a legit home?) But we did, and its so cute. Some of the more braggable attributes include- a washer/dryer in the house, a detached two stall garage, large backyard, and fairly prime location. When we pulled up to the house, Andrew says I squealed "ooooohhhh its a cuuuuute house", which is entirely accurate. Now if only we could figure out a way to pick it up and move it someplace tropical.
Perhaps the biggest issue with the move...is the actual moving. First off, lets just say between the two of us, we have a lot of crap. Yes crap...in addition to our necessary stuff...each of us probably have upwards of 15 pairs of shoes and we both are clothes whores...it looks like I have more but that is only because half of his stuff still resides at his parents house. My clothes...all live together with me...because to be honest and perhaps a bit vain/shallow I adore my clothes. So, in addition to our multitude of shoes and having enough clothes to cover several continents for several days, we have an abundance of electronics, bedding and in general crap. So all this equates to a need to pack a lot of stuff, which is in essence a HUGE pain in the butt. So for the last month I have spent my days going through boxes, bags and tubs worth of stuff we have accumulated in this last year from family wanting to clean our their houses to our visits at garage sales and just things that have followed us throughout our years together.
So following the packing, comes...the inevitable moving of said stuff...which will end this Saturday. My wonderful(read sometimes exasperating) family is coming up, along with my best friend and Andrew's best friend to aide us in the endeavor...which will, I'm sure be most interesting. I am very excited to show off my new home and everything, and yet my trepidations about Saturday continue to grow...what if the weather is bad? what if my parents are fighting? what if I become homicidal?(please note there is a 95% chance this may and will happen). I must admit that moving furniture has absolutely no appeal to me, so I will be content to unpack and direct while the man like creatures move said furniture, followed by grunting, sweating and likely lots of cursing.
The only thing worse than packing and moving...unpacking. With packing you have the option to just take stuff and throw it in boxes and deal with it later, or go the more organized route of packing using bubble wrap, and labels. For the first two weeks of this escapade I packed with labels, bubble wrap and color coded tubs. For the last two weeks, I've looked around and said "ehh screw it" and everything has been mixed. So while I may think tub A holds bedding and tub B holds my pyrex casseroles, it will be so very interesting when I open tub A to find my casserole co mingling with my pillowcases and bedroom TV remote. But really, the true task will be getting it all organized and being comfortable with it. For the first month of living in the apartment I am leaving I would go into the kitchen and think ok drawer number 1 has silverware and drawer number two holds my aluminum foil and cling wrap. It took me a whole month to discover that the damn silverware was in my junk drawer and my junk drawer was occupying 3 other drawers...and now a full year later I am not going to tell you if the junk drawer has been reigned in or if it now occupies the entire kitchen. And yes, it has taken me a full year to learn where everything is and be able to tell Andrew where the spatula is when he yells down the hall to me that he needs something while I am in a different room.
Adaptation and perhaps a strong need for alcohol might get me through this move with flying colors. So on Saturday, while everyone is sleeping in I will be listening to my Dad cursing, my mom saying "no that should go here", Andrew asking where I want X and watching my best friend attempt to stifle her laughter...someone please be taking a shot or having a Captain and Coke for me!
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Why is a wedding so stressful? Is it because it's supposed to be one of the best days in your life? Or is it because of the money? How about all of the people who are supposed to be blown away by what months and months worth of planning has culminated in?
People say wedding planning is fun. That you are supposed to enjoy the months before the wedding, that all of the hard work, endless phone calls, emails and meetings are going to add up to this amazing day, where you (as the bride) are the star. I SWEAR TO GOD IF ONE MORE PERSON ASKS ME HOW THE WEDDING IS COMING THERE MAY BE ONE LESS GUEST AT MY WEDDING.
Wedding planning in a nutshell has brought out the crazy in my mom, yes I always knew it was there, but she shall now be referred to (affectionately of course) as Momzilla. Now, you may ask why or how she has earned this title. It's very simple...if you have ever heard the term Bridezilla, or seen the TV show, you know their antics, temper tantrums and in general out of control behavior has earned them a, perhaps coveted, spot on the show. My mother, does not throw temper tantrums and yet the majority of my friends, and even some members of my own family are afraid of her. Being the oldest child, and the only daughter has often benefited me, in the form of surprise shopping trips, concert tickets, parties and the like.
However, being the first one in the family to get married has dramatically changed my life within the last 4 months. I think there may be something in the water or the air at my parents house, because my mom has reached a whole new brand of crazy while planning my wedding. My mom has whole heartedly thrown herself into planning my wedding(for which I adore and admire her) and at the same time want to hide under my covers with the lights off and hope a call from the bogeyman is the reason why my blackberry is ringing for the 12th time in the last 2 hours. From phone calls about the centerpieces and favors, to calls while checking out in a store, to calls while watching Rich Bride, Poor Bride, the ideas are running rampant.
The problem is- being unemployed makes it really hard to think about spending any money on something that isn't rent, food or bills. So crystal centerpieces and shotglass favors aren't the things that mean the world to me right now. I know my wedding is important, and of course I want it to be amazing and beautiful and on that day I want to look around and think to myself "ohmigod!", but right now, I'm more worried about paying my car insurance and not becoming a financial burden to my fiancé, than what's going to be in the center of the tables that my guests sit at. So, while I love my mom so very much for all the work she's doing, when my blackberry rings, I usually hope it's someone calling to tell me I won the lotto or that my long lost great aunt Mildred (I don't think I have one...but if I did...) has passed away and that I am inheriting a tidy sum of money as a result. Instead, it typically goes something like this "So what do you think about adding...(insert crystals, flowers or candles) to....(insert guest tables, the centerpieces or the entry table)" to which I reply "I'd have to look at it and talk to Andrew" and then we say goodbye. Typically there is another call in about an hour or so.
And as if having Momzilla on top of things wasn't enough, there are also the numerous phone calls, emails and postcards sent from a variety of wedding specialty vendors who are just dying to get my business (read want my money). Seriously, if I wanted to use your services I would have booked you months ago...not a few months before my wedding, now please go away, stop calling me and stop flooding my inbox with your offers, ads and promises to "make my day a day to remember"...my day is going to be a day to remember, because I might have a stroke, heart attack, nervous breakdown or all of the above before or on that "magical" day.
Perhaps attributing to my neurosis about wedding planning is the fact that I am moving at the end of this month. Yep, in the middle of planning my wedding I am moving. And no, it isn't to some beautiful destination where I have always dreamed of living, instead its to a cold, snowy Siberia like area, known as Utica NY. Due to my lack of employment(stupid employers...you want me...damn it!), it has become un-necessary for Andrew and I to live in the Capitol area, and as such are moving closer to his job. Don't get me wrong, I know there has to be something good about that area...someone? anyone? But, right now, it's just cold and snowy to me. We have found a really sweet house in a good area, pretty close to everything...but moving is just more stress. So, right now my apartment is in upheaval with boxes everywhere, clothes split between two homes and not having much of anything to make dinners with at the apartment. My dog goes ballistic when Andrew or I bring in an empty box, maybe she thinks there is some evil, invading box monster? My Mom(read Momzilla) has been coming up to help me pack and get stuff situated, which is good, since Andrew is busy working and we seem to have accumulated an insane amount of junk...which is now sitting in garbage bags to be gotten rid of.
Thus, stress levels and tension are pretty high throughout my days. Moving and a wedding...I must be insane or sick. A little less than 2 weeks and the move will be done, and then I can focus on the crystal, flower or candles to go on the guest tables, centerpieces or entry table. And, although I complain, I know without my mom the wedding wouldn't be what it is going to be and things wouldn't be so easy...errmmm less stressful...for me. So, thanks Mom!!
But, until then...could someone please pass the bogeyman my phone number? And, does anyone know someone who prescribes xanax?
People say wedding planning is fun. That you are supposed to enjoy the months before the wedding, that all of the hard work, endless phone calls, emails and meetings are going to add up to this amazing day, where you (as the bride) are the star. I SWEAR TO GOD IF ONE MORE PERSON ASKS ME HOW THE WEDDING IS COMING THERE MAY BE ONE LESS GUEST AT MY WEDDING.
Wedding planning in a nutshell has brought out the crazy in my mom, yes I always knew it was there, but she shall now be referred to (affectionately of course) as Momzilla. Now, you may ask why or how she has earned this title. It's very simple...if you have ever heard the term Bridezilla, or seen the TV show, you know their antics, temper tantrums and in general out of control behavior has earned them a, perhaps coveted, spot on the show. My mother, does not throw temper tantrums and yet the majority of my friends, and even some members of my own family are afraid of her. Being the oldest child, and the only daughter has often benefited me, in the form of surprise shopping trips, concert tickets, parties and the like.
However, being the first one in the family to get married has dramatically changed my life within the last 4 months. I think there may be something in the water or the air at my parents house, because my mom has reached a whole new brand of crazy while planning my wedding. My mom has whole heartedly thrown herself into planning my wedding(for which I adore and admire her) and at the same time want to hide under my covers with the lights off and hope a call from the bogeyman is the reason why my blackberry is ringing for the 12th time in the last 2 hours. From phone calls about the centerpieces and favors, to calls while checking out in a store, to calls while watching Rich Bride, Poor Bride, the ideas are running rampant.
The problem is- being unemployed makes it really hard to think about spending any money on something that isn't rent, food or bills. So crystal centerpieces and shotglass favors aren't the things that mean the world to me right now. I know my wedding is important, and of course I want it to be amazing and beautiful and on that day I want to look around and think to myself "ohmigod!", but right now, I'm more worried about paying my car insurance and not becoming a financial burden to my fiancé, than what's going to be in the center of the tables that my guests sit at. So, while I love my mom so very much for all the work she's doing, when my blackberry rings, I usually hope it's someone calling to tell me I won the lotto or that my long lost great aunt Mildred (I don't think I have one...but if I did...) has passed away and that I am inheriting a tidy sum of money as a result. Instead, it typically goes something like this "So what do you think about adding...(insert crystals, flowers or candles) to....(insert guest tables, the centerpieces or the entry table)" to which I reply "I'd have to look at it and talk to Andrew" and then we say goodbye. Typically there is another call in about an hour or so.
And as if having Momzilla on top of things wasn't enough, there are also the numerous phone calls, emails and postcards sent from a variety of wedding specialty vendors who are just dying to get my business (read want my money). Seriously, if I wanted to use your services I would have booked you months ago...not a few months before my wedding, now please go away, stop calling me and stop flooding my inbox with your offers, ads and promises to "make my day a day to remember"...my day is going to be a day to remember, because I might have a stroke, heart attack, nervous breakdown or all of the above before or on that "magical" day.
Perhaps attributing to my neurosis about wedding planning is the fact that I am moving at the end of this month. Yep, in the middle of planning my wedding I am moving. And no, it isn't to some beautiful destination where I have always dreamed of living, instead its to a cold, snowy Siberia like area, known as Utica NY. Due to my lack of employment(stupid employers...you want me...damn it!), it has become un-necessary for Andrew and I to live in the Capitol area, and as such are moving closer to his job. Don't get me wrong, I know there has to be something good about that area...someone? anyone? But, right now, it's just cold and snowy to me. We have found a really sweet house in a good area, pretty close to everything...but moving is just more stress. So, right now my apartment is in upheaval with boxes everywhere, clothes split between two homes and not having much of anything to make dinners with at the apartment. My dog goes ballistic when Andrew or I bring in an empty box, maybe she thinks there is some evil, invading box monster? My Mom(read Momzilla) has been coming up to help me pack and get stuff situated, which is good, since Andrew is busy working and we seem to have accumulated an insane amount of junk...which is now sitting in garbage bags to be gotten rid of.
Thus, stress levels and tension are pretty high throughout my days. Moving and a wedding...I must be insane or sick. A little less than 2 weeks and the move will be done, and then I can focus on the crystal, flower or candles to go on the guest tables, centerpieces or entry table. And, although I complain, I know without my mom the wedding wouldn't be what it is going to be and things wouldn't be so easy...errmmm less stressful...for me. So, thanks Mom!!
But, until then...could someone please pass the bogeyman my phone number? And, does anyone know someone who prescribes xanax?
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